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| The Voice of Towne Lake | |
The Flagship of Around Town Community Magazines | July 2008 |
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Dr. Litrel- Human Struggles
by Mike Litrel, M.D.My boys prefer staying home to going to school. Make that ditto for going to church. And they are not shy about expressing their feelings on the matter. Our requests to “get up and get dressed” are often met with grumbles of resentment, alternating with cries of despair and the occasional inappropriate gesture visible only when one’s back is half turned.Parenting would be so much easier if children liked doing those things that are good for them — like homework…cleaning their room…or making breakfast for their Dad. Instead, it seems that kids are most enthusiastic about unhealthy activities: watching television, playing video games and eating junk food. My job as a father boils down to corralling my children away from unhealthy activities they like into healthy activities that they hate. Each Sunday morning, I optimistically imagine a serene hour at church celebrating the gift of life with my family. Instead, I am confronted with real live children, mine. What’s worse are the emotions that arise in my own heart after my kids begin their ritual complaints. The thoughts that sometimes fl it through my head sound like bumper stickers for religious Neanderthals: Pray or I’ll Pound You I’ll Beat You with a Bible, Boy Believe in God or Be Grounded Something about threats of bodily harm doesn’t seem to resonate with the teachings of the Son of Man. An uneasy family compromise has evolved which stipulates no complaining, one church event a week, either youth group on a weekday or church services on Sunday. Tyler is a procrastinator, so he drags himself out of bed Sunday morning and attends with Ann and me. Joseph cheerfully elects to attend his youth group earlier in the week, and then enjoys a leisurely Sunday brunch at my parents’ house, a compromise which, though peaceful, makes Ann uncomfortable. So imagine the emotional distress during Holy Week when Joseph was informed by his mother that, contrary to the controversial family compromise, he was going to attend church with the rest of the family on Easter Sunday. His objections were next door to blasphemy, and didn’t contribute to parental peace of mind. Something about not getting what the big deal was with Easter, and how come there weren’t any presents. Now, I know that Joseph, being 11 years old, was only comparing the Easter experience to fond memories of Christmas. But just for good measure, I decided that instead of going to Easter services at 11 a.m., we’d awaken early and go at sunrise. So it was. The boys remained relatively attentive and quiet until nearly the end of the service. Then I noticed Joseph next to me quivering. I thought maybe he had the fidgets, but a closer look indicated he was quivering with rage. It seems his older brother Tyler had whispered to him that the Easter service, instead of lasting the usual one hour, would go on for a full four. Tyler later assured me that upsetting his brother had not been his intention; sadly, Tyler had himself been misinformed. Right. I don’t blame my boys for having the natural feelings of boys. Truthfully, there are some Sunday mornings I wouldn’t mind lying down on the couch and eating donuts. But, if there is one thing clear to me in practicing medicine, it’s that our lives are not just about making our bodies comfortable. The soul is much longer lived, and thus requires more nourishment than the physical body, which, after all, simply returns to dust in the end. Patients come to see me with all kinds of suffering. There is nothing better than placing a beautiful baby in the arms of a new mother after a healthy delivery. Or hearing a patient’s relief and happiness after surgery, when she is living without pain for the first time in years. The problems of the body are the easy ones. But an unhappy soul cannot be fixed with medication or surgery. The difficult problems are those of the spirit. We are not human beings having spiritual problems; we are spiritual beings having human problems.
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